[00:05:21] five hundred miles just to see a halo. says:
i fell in love with writing again recently. i've written 35,863 words of the story i was telling you about.
[00:05:13] breadcrumbtrail says:
have you stuck with the stuff you showed me a while back?
[00:05:21] five hundred miles just to see a halo. says:
i've taken bits out. sometimes i over-discribed things like dickens...
[00:06:15] breadcrumbtrail says:
its a bit like choosing what finger to cut off trying to edit, but eventually you end up stumpy and liberated.

i love everything about the film 'juno,' but especially the script. diable cody is a fantastic script writer.



BLEEKER
You don’t have any
reason to be mad at me. You broke
my heart. I should be royally
ticked at you, man. I should be
really cheesed off. I shouldn’t
want to talk to you anymore.

JUNO
Why? Because I got bored and had
sex with you one day, and then I
didn’t, like, marry you?

BLEEKER
Like I’d marry you! You would be the
meanest wife of all time. And anyway,
I know you weren’t bored that day
because there was a lot of stuff on
TV. The Blair Witch Project was on
Starz, and you were like, “Oh, I want
to watch this, but we should make out
instead. La la la.”

in the late afternoons we went out for dinner and every night i seemed to have the best dessert ever, when the evening rolled around, we localised like champs. 

our hotel in barcelona was beautiful. right in the heart of las ramblas, we cruised the winding streets until we knew them like the back of our hands.

i am pissed off for three reasons. one of which i will not elaborate on because it is personal, the other two i will, however, discuss as they're slightly more...trivial:

my reasons are: firstly, maria sharapova is out of roland garros after dinara safina beat her and secondly, the crowd at roland garros were so hostile during said match that i just want to kick something. arghh.

sharapova was on the fringes of a place in the quarterfinals, serving for the match and one point away from victory in the only grand slam she hasn't yet won when safina hit a backhand winner at 5-3, 40-30 down, took that game and won the match 6-7 (6-8), 7-6 (7-5), 6- 2.

the crowd at suzanne lenglen court became nasty when sharapova served at 2-3 in the final set. the majority of the 9,900 capacity crowd booed when she called the chair umpire to check a line call on the baseline. when it didn't go her way, the hostile crowd then cheered.



they also applauded when she sent a forehand shot in the net at the next point. during the following games, sharapova let out loud screams of frustration and repeatedly beat on herself, swearing whilst berating herself after the crowd cheered some of her missed serves.

something needs to be done about the jeering crowds, it happens quite a lot and for a major sporting event, it's not right that this isn't dealt with. i mean, it's certainly not a rare occurance when the french open crowd turn nasty; spectators at roland garros are famous for making their opinions known to the players and this is the second year in a row that sharapova has been booed off in the so-called city of love.

one of the reasons i love watching her play is because she is such a tough player, her concentration is immense and her mental focus on the game is second to none. she only seemed to let the crowd affect her twice during this tough match: once when the crowd wouldn't stop doing the mexican wave in the last set and then again when she left the court with her head-down to a chorus of boos.

however, like i said, she may have the mental focus of a london guard, but in the post-interview she came across generally down-beat. she sighed, "i can't please everyone, it's not in my job description. i'm an athlete. i go out there and i fight my heart out. if they're hostile, then you know, i mean, they paid the ticket to watch me, so they must appreciate me on some level, right?'' to which the interviewer did not look convinced and replied, "not really. they're entitled to their opinion.

could he possibly make her feel any worse? what an idiot.

1. chocolate.
2. justine henin.

world no. 1 seed justine henin announced her retirement from professional tennis on wednesday, "with immediate effect" !

as maria sharapova is currently seeded no. 2 in the world; henin's retirement means that as of monday the 19th sharapova will reclaim the world number 1 ranking, which i'm thrilled about, but at the same time, i'm still dissapointed that henin has retired, especially right before the french open -being on clay- where she plays exceptionally well.

anyway, i guess she can start spending all of that prize money she's earned in her career.

i think i'd buy an island with it... or a segment of the moon.

xbox 360 > playstation 3.

even though i'm going travelling this summer, in the back of my mind -somewhere - i wanted to make it to the wimbledon finals too, i was hoping that maybe, somehow i could get a flight to london for a couple of days from wherever i'll be in july....and i mean, i knew it'd be an extortion-ate thing to do - what with the already expensive three-month holiday - but i reallyreallyreally had my heart set on going to wimbledon this year...until i just logged on to the box office and -UGH, HAMAGAD- had my dreams shattered prematurely:

Sat, 5 July: Ladies Final £1150.00!!!!
Sun, 6 July: Mens Final £2450.00!!!!!!

is that even legal?!

Recommended Film: Espíritu de la colmena, El. (The Spirit of the Beehive)
I am going to urge you, no, in fact beg you to watch Víctor Erice's 'Espíritu de la colmena, El.' (The Spirit of the Beehive, 1978)
It is a completely flawless work of Cinema: It is artistic, innovative, inspiring, tragic, Political, beautiful.

The film is set in the aftermath of the Spanish Civil War and centres around Ana, a sensitive seven-year-old who lives in a rural Village named Castille. Traumatised after watching "Frankenstein" Ana begins questioning her older sister Isabel about life and death, to which Isabel replies that Frankstein is real and inhabits a nearby barn. Although Ana is scared, she is also fascinated by the mystery of the Monster and thus devotes her time to looking for it, which leads her to discover a fugitive soldier, whom she believes to be the Spirit of Frankstein.

The film can be viewed and interpreted on whichever level you want, which I love. It is not pretentious. On the surface 'Espíritu de la colmena, El' is a portrayal in to the imagination of a child whose family is struggling to cope with post-Civil War life. However, the film is also laden with deeper Political meanings. Similar to recent Spanish success 'Pan's Labyrinth' the film juxtaposes the fantasy of a child's mind and the harsh brutalities of War and reality. The bees in the film symbolise the subservient Spanish people under the cruel leadership of Franco, and the beehive can be seen as a metaphor for the isolation of post-War Spain . Ana and sister Isabel represent the two groups - Republican and Nationalist- that fought in the Spanish War, and the encounter of Ana with the fugitive soldier can be interpreted as the impossibility of the two groups uniting: the two can not exist in the same World.

There are brilliant and incredibly brave metaphors - it is remarkable that the film even dared to address Franco's cruel leadership before his death - in the film that make it genius, but it is the story of Ana's childhood discoveries that make the film a masterpiece. PLEASE watch it!

Still not convinced?

Well...hmm...I don't know what else to say...OK, Ana Torrent (who plays Ana) is without doubt the best child actor I have ever seen! No question about it, she gives that Dakota Fanning a run for her money.

Also -an intriguing but tragic fact - Luis Cuadrado (the film's Cinematographer) was going blind at the time the film was shot which adds an interesting look to the film, the long amounts of time he spent on every shot is almost like he was savouring the view whilst he could. He, unfortunately, later went completely blind and commit suicide.

unprovoked flower bud-related fights are fun.

on the bus home from work, i overheard somebody saying, "i hate having a kingsized bed and being the only one in it" and it made me feel sad.

one of my goals in 2007 was to read (or in some cases re-read) fifty books or more.
*2008 EDIT* - I DID IT!


i read:

01. 'the perks of being a wallflower.' - stephen chbosky.
02. 'hard boiled.' - banana yoshimoto.
03. 'hard luck.' - banana yoshimoto.
04. 'tuesday nights and wednesday mornings.' - gwendoline riley.
05. 'franny and zooey.' - j.d salinger.
06. 'the catcher in the rye.' - j.d salinger.
07. 'girl, interrupted.' - susanna kaysen.
08. 'rescuing patty hearst: memories from a decade gone mad.' - virginia holman.
09. 'brass' - helen welsh.
10. 'the curious incident of the dog in the night-time' - mark haddon.
11. 'the diary of a young girl.' - anne frank.
12. 'a clockwork orange.' - anthony burgess.
13. 'big fish' - daniel wallace.
14. 'the chocolate war' -robert cormier.
15. 'the unthinkable thoughts of jacob green' - joshua braff.
16. 'the contortionist's handbook' - craig clevenger.
17. 'nobody belongs here more than you.' - miranda july.
18. 'harry potter and the philosopher's stone' - j.k. rowling.
19. 'harry potter and the chamber of secrets- j.k. rowling.
20. 'harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban' - j.k. rowling.
21. 'harry potter and the goblet of fire' - j.k. rowling.
22. 'harry potter and the order of the phoenix' - j.k. rowling.
23. 'harry potter and the half-blood prince' - j.k. rowling.
24. 'harry potter and the deathly hallows' - j.k. rowling. [:'(]
25. 'the lord of the rings' [triology] - j r.r tolkien
26. 'mysterious skin' - scott heim
27. 'brick lane' - monica ali
28. 'the outsiders" - s.e hinton
29. 'running with scissors' - augusten burroughs
30. 'the five people you meet in heaven' - mitch albom
31. 'memoirs of a geisha' - arthur golden
32. 'the accidentla' - ali smith
33. 'the adventures of hucklberry finn' - mark twain
34. 'brave new world - aldous huxley
35. 'middlesex' - jefferey eugenides
36. 'the beach' - alex garland
37. 'either/or: a fragment of life' - søren kierkegaard
38. 'the god of small things' - arundhati roy
39. 'riding in cars with boys' - beverly donofrio
40. 'how the light gets in' - m.j hyland
41. 'my summer of love' - helen cross
42. 'the bell jar' - sylvia plath [i re-read this every year.]
43. 'the great gatsby- - f.scott fitzgerald
44. 'on the road' - jack kerouac
45. 'the diving bell and the butterfly' - jean dominique bauby
46. 'dead souls' - nikolai gogol
47. 'anna karenina' - leo tolstoy
48. 'high fidelity' - nick hornby
49. 'if nobody speaks of remarkable things' - jon mcgregor
50. 'either side of winter' - benjamin markovits
51. 'the love germ' - jill neville
52. 'a handful of dust' - evelyn waugh
53. 'the brothers karamazov' - fyodor dostoevsky
54. 'notes from the underground' - fyodor dostoevsky

POETRY BOOKS/VOLUMES:

1. 'howl and other poems' - allen ginsberg
2. 'free stallion' - amber tamblyn
3. 'ariel' - sylvia plath
4.'the whitsun weddings' - phillip larkin
5. 'the palm at the end of my mind' - wallace stevens

today was pretty stressful.

it was undoubtedly the busiest day in work i've ever experienced.
all of the customers kept on stating the obvious: "oooh! isn't it busy?!" or "i'd hate to be working right now!"

oh, really? would you? why? because it's full of people like *you* trying shoes on and not buying them?!

my quite inedible mood stayed with me after work. naturally, i missed the bus home by about two minutes and subsequently had to wait an hour for the next one; when the bus finally arrived, i slumped on and huddled down in to an empty chair near the back, i was just about to finally start relaxing when this over-weight, heavy breathing stranger chose to sit next to me when the bus wasn't even fully occupied. she smelt like a wet dog and made me real nervy... i was literally forced to bite the sleeve of my jumper to try and hide my nose from her rancid stench without making it too obvious. & now there is a huge hole in it that will constantly remind of her.

when i got home, i discovered that i was locked out, my key was in the coat i'd also forgot to take to work that morning. (my warm coat - which would have been nice considering it was now pouring down.) after some pacing up and down my front garden, i decided to walk to oxfam bookstore hoping to buy a book to keep me busy... as i only had 50p & there was nothing prominent for less than/equal to 50p i ended up buying the only thing i could afford: this completely peculiar children's book by an obscure russian writer... written in russian. it was 38p & trying to understand the jist of it by looking at the pictures made my brain hurt.
to hide from the rain & to see my best friend i stumbled to movie bank where francesca works; on the way a young chap looked at me then mumbled something about there being, "too many art fags in chorlton" to his bushy haired girlfriend who laughed like it was the funniest thing she had ever heard. i felt sorry for her.

i ended up lying on the floor in movie bank, making 'snow' angels in the dust and small layer of access water that had been dragged in clinging to peoples shoes. clearly noting my tiredness and insanity francesca asked if i'd like to go to sleep on the floor in the back but by then i had discovered what the inside of the dvd dispenser machine looked like and was too intrigued playing with it to sleep.

the remainder of my day was spent making chris a mix cd & chatting to my nana on the phone about her eccentric neighbours and their eccentric cats with racist names...

december greets me with promises of snow and ice skating. the first snow fight of the year seems close, it sounds crazy but i can smell it.

my nana carole has an unbelievable collection of books, ranging from austen to zaehner, her own personal library, stacked literally from carpet to ceiling in all of her rooms and under her bed, in the bathroom cabinets, kitchen cupboards, piled on to the living room sofa, the piano, the television.

it's sheer bliss being around so many books that actually mean something to someone; books that have been collected and treasured for years, thumbed through so much that the binding is frail, and underlined with side notes.

i feel slightly overwhelmed.

i'm convinced people think i'm crazy.